In my mind, Winter Sessions was never supposed to exist. It 100% snuck up on me.
All four of these songs were written first in a “Springtime” of sorts in my life. I was working really hard to blossom and shine after a hard transition, making light of what felt heavy, burying what still hurt. I released these songs first with my “Hullaballo” album. I thought it was all done, in the past, completed, time to move on to something else, when the song “Backtalking” began haunting me every time I sat at the piano. One day, I gave into the whatever that song needed to say to me, and I let it take me where it wanted to go. Through tears and salty piano keys, I starting singing new parts of that song that were deeply healing to my heart.
In that moment, I realized something: this song had more to say to me. You can find those words I started singing that day in the Winter Sessions version of "Backtalking".
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The second I just gave in and said, “well I might just be redoing this thing…”, other songs cropped up had things to say to me as well. I still had grief I needed to work through (see “Fake My Size”). Anger, too (see “Crypt”). Don't even get me started on facing uncertainty (see "I Don't Know). All these things I just wanted to be past, but wasn't yet. And there was only one way to the other side: through it.
Winter Sessions was born when I needed to enter my own deep winter, a period of rest, recovery, and quietness in order to truly begin healing.
The instruments in this project are intentionally stripped: cello & piano with some guitar. That sounded like wintertime to me. Quiet. Slow. Bare. I was privileged to work with amazing artists in Nashville, and they performed in such a heartfelt way, it still brings tears to my eyes. The imagery for this project (photo & video) was done in an old barn usually inhabited by owls and other critters. There were holes in the ground and piles and piles of owl pellets (owl barf, not poo, I learned) and overall, it was absolutely perfect.
The stunning dancing in the videos was done by Preem Mendoza, and it’s there to represent one of the special ways I started reconnecting to myself after this painful time: dance. Super late at night (like 9:15 for me), I would turn off all the lights in the house, go upstairs, and dance out whatever was inside me. It was such a healing practice for me, and I wanted to convey that important part of journey through video.
It is a humbling thing as an artist to say, “You know those songs I already released? Well I think I’m actually going to change them and release them again…”, but when I started, honoring the songs became more important than honoring my ego. And I’m so glad I did it.
When you listen to these songs, I strongly recommend having cozy socks, a steaming cup of tea, and a very, very soft blanket to accompany you. Be gentle to yourself. There is so much going on in that gorgeous heart of yours, and it's okay to take the time you need to rest.
Thank you so much for coming on this musical journey with me. Your support is deeply meaningful to me.
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Journal Prompts:
Where can I be more honest with myself?
How can I honor my need for rest today?
xoxo
Anna